Divine Revelation

The Divine Revelation of $trom, also known simply as the Divine Revelation, was a paragraph composed by The $trom that started his following.

Discovery
Initially, The $trom posted his Divine Revelation on the walls of many university pages in the land of Facebook, hoping to start the following he deserved. However, the sheer $velt of the $trom was too much for the simple minded fools at Cornell and Harvard, and they ignored it.

The Divine Revelation was discovered by Prie$t Ahmed as he wandered the dark chambers of the unforgiving land of Facebook. Immediately struck by its beauty and clear message, he took it upon himself to show everyone else the Revelation. Thus was created the religion of $tromism.

The Divine Revelation
In its pure, unedited and untouched form, the Divine Revelation (revealed to Harvard) is as follows:

''Whaddup Harvard 2016?! The names Johnny Strom, and I'm from Long Island New York. Anybody out there still lookin' for a roommate? I'm 6'2 and am a very svelt 220 lbs. I run approximately 11 mph. I am interested in the ladies and plan on having many "sleepovers" if you catch my drift. I shower regularly and have been known to brush my teeth from time to time. As far as the bed situation goes, I have terrible back problems, so i will require two beds pushed together. As far as my daily rutine is concerned, I like to wake and bake around 11, Keg and eggs around 11:30, go back to bed, miss all my classes, wake up around 9:45, quick dinner at subway, and then in the club by midnight. I should usually be home around 4. Rinse and repeat. If you are interested in having the full college crazy train experience, contact your conductor, Johnny Stromboli, either through inbox or by email at johnnystromboli@yahoo.com. Remember, there are only two kinds of people at college, losers, and people who party with the Strom. HMU if you know what's good.''

It is a fact that anyone who reads the Divine Revelation in full has already accepted $trom into their hearts, even if they deny it.

Further revelations were given to us when the profit Johnny contacted the $trom. His most holy followers learned that $trom struggles to keep the ladies at bay and that he is a Republican who does not believe in handouts.